honesty is the best policy

Is it just me. Or is this world being irrational? There are some points in life, where we just have to forget and leave everything behind and just turn over a new leaf. For better or for worse. Sometimes, the worse thing that could or might happen may be the best thing that could ever happen to you. I just feel so insecure and tragic right now. Its like i've lost a part of me. I feel alone and lifeless just like a cat drowned in a bath tub gasping for air. I feel confused and dazzled just like when i get hit by a wall and i get butterflies all over my head. Being alone is nice. But not for too long. You'll get sick and tired easily. You'll give up on things easily. And you curse easily.

But to top my emotionally pressured self, i have a million things that i am thankful for. I have a wonderful dad that keeps me laughing with his ridiculous and hilarious jokes. I have a mom that keeps me company and supports me in everything that i do. I have a brother who never fails to irritate and bug me 24/7. I have cousins who backs me up all the time and that never fails to be my shoulder to cry on everytime i get wet. I have grandparents, aunts and uncles that are cooler than Dr. And Mrs. Cullen. I have friends who i feel are like my greatest joy in life besides my family.

But still. Inside me, there's still a hole waiting to be healed by someone or something powerful enough. I am fragile and i always wobble. I hate heartaches but i get them in everyway that i can imagine. I listen to sentimental songs when i am down. I eat a lot when i'm happy. I curse when everything seems to go wrong. I cry when my life's turning black instead of pink. I go ballistic when someone lies to me straight to my face, talks behind my back and pick points at others lavishly without thinking. I loathe people who are not honest and polite. I have life mottos that i bear in mind each and everyday. I make truckloads of mistakes and i still try standing tall. I have the tendency to repeat my mistakes and i do appologize when i do so. I try changing but humans don't seem to appreciate other people's changes. And to top it all. I am who i am.