i run out of words to say when i see you

Hi. Firstly, you really did caught me off-guard. Making me run in circles like i'm some kind of a maniac when really, i am not one. Truth be told, i really don't know how to differenciate, What's right and What's wrong. I am even clueless when it comes to making perfect sense out of my words. I jumble up my words a lot. And even my behaviour and emotions go haywire plus the fact that i'll just end my phrases abruptly. I thought, i'm serious i really thought all this was true and not just something that made no sense at all. But then, day by day, your actions are just plain weird and different and that makes it hard for me to comprehend your actions and words. In short, i am very very confused. But at the same time You just dazzle me everytime i see you. What's all this ? Each and every person that i'm close to, tells me that this ain't a dream, it's bittersweet reality and i dont have to worry. How can i not worry when everytime i think of it, i'm always at wits end. I can even cry in the middle of the night like some mad cow. That's how crucial things are now. I just need a sign. People say i shouldn't give up and frankly, i myself don't want too but come to think of it, maybe, its for the best. I'm tired of experimenting my emotions again. Once was more than enough. That once changed me and everything that has got to do with me. So no more.

Phheeewww.
Finally, i get to write. It's nothing, nothing at all. I was just imagining and picturing life from a different view. Painful yet it still is life. I'm under pmr pressure right now. Get so tied up a lot lately. I won't be updating anymore til the thirteenth. Goodluck PMR candidates.