I can be a hero baby.

I wonder why I always procrastinate. I mean, whatever I do has to start with phrase like, "okaylah just a minute" or "kejap lagilah" or "there's still tomorrow" or "its never too late". I get no work done at all by the end of it. I'll just laze around pretending like there's nothing to be done. Seriously, it's got to stop, eventually it must. I mean I'm not growing any younger. And as the day passes by, every second, minute and hour of everyday, I'm getting closer to bigger hurdles in life. 

Looking back, I was always the active kid in school. Always joining whatever competitions the school held. Being on stage, performing just about anything even singing and dancing wasn't scary to me. I was brave and I didn't need any paperclips to hold on to while I was doing what I was supposed to do on stage. I'm not bragging, I just.. I just miss those moments. I never procrastinate and everything went ever so smoothly. 

Now, it's the other way around. Nothing seems to be done. Everything is pulled back and paused and delayed. I start my sentences with buts and ifs not I will or I am going too. I dissociate myself from involving myself in clubs or any activities. At first, it was just for the sake of taking a break. Then it just lived with me and grew onto me. 

All these has to come to an end. I pray for a miracle, for a change everyday.

Oh please, help me.