lets put an end to it

I am in my happy place.
An okay place.
Okay, its a nice place actually.
A very peaceful place.
A place where everything seems right. A sane place.
The only place where my mind doesn't go and make silly assumptions.
A place where everything seems to be in place.
A place where my three favourite people live in.
A small place, i can say.
Small but very comfortable and cosy.
And this is my place.
This is home.

rejuvenating

Sometimes, us mankind, we tend to forget how blessed and lucky we are to be given the opportunity to live in this, i shall say mean world. Though this world we live in can also be called mean, it is the place where we gain knowledge, friends, enemies and so we can go on with the list forever and ever as it's just far too long. And some may realize how great God's creations are. Some might not even care. Some might care but dare not say a thing. Some may think about it but in the end just forget about it and just continue on with life.

But oh yes, despite it all. Life can be deceiving. It sounds cliche, i am well aware. But its the truth. Life can be deceiving. But still, it is great to have a life rather than not having any. I used to feel that life is just unfair. We don't get what we want, we don't have everything we want and things don't always flow and go the way we want it to be. I've learned a lot. More than i thought i would. But still, we do get heartaches and pain once in a while. And i can say, this pain is scarcely endurable. And for as long as i am capable of keeping my life on track, i am okay. Like i always am.

I idolize people. I have just too many people that i look up to. I look up to people that change their lifes and that tries to make changes to the world. I look up to people like, Tun Dr Mahathir, he is a man full of discipline and determination. I look up to people like, Michael Jackson, he may be humanly flawed as he tries to hard to change his original self, but thats just besides it. He is a kind hearted man. A loving man and a man who tries to heal the world and that tries to make it a better place. As for the ladies, i look up to many celebrities and iconic people, some from the older generation and some from my generation. These people are, Oprah winfrey, emma watson, beyonce. Etc. Why don't we ourselves try achieving what these people have achieved. We are the ones that determine our future. Whichever way it goes. And the best way is to just follow your heart and your dreams and at the same time to just go with the flow. It'll bring you somewhere. Some place you might like, some place where you might find everything you've been looking for all this while. Just, maybe. I mean, who knows?

blessing in disguise

I am blessed. No, really. I am blessed. And i am grateful for everything that has and will happen before and after this. Despite having problems that never fail to upset me, some may be nothing whilst some may be something just too bizarre, i am glad it all happened. I take it as a blessing in disguise. These are the things that make this world a better place to live in. These past few weeks of hanging out with my cousind has thought me a lot. And i mean, a lot alot. Having parents like my parents, is the best. The best gift that i could ever ask for. And having a brother that understands u inside and out just like your parents, that is priceless. And for that, i am blessed.

I know its far too early to be thinking about courses i might want to take in the future but still, ill go through it sooner or later. Got so many courses that i want to take, but yes i know. I can only choose one. For now that is.

For the record, i know i keep saying this. But, i love fashion. It means so much to me, that mostly everything i say has got to do with it.

I know im jumping from one topic to another but today is the only day i get to blog. I need to study. Gotta set my priorities right. And gotta strive. And i gotta work hard so that ill succeed. I know i can, yes i know i can:)

XxxxxxX

finally.

I had a blast watching MU. and i know its far too late to blog about it but heck, i promised i would and so i am now. hah, finally. freedom. I have nothing much to write as what i felt while i was there cannot be written. Only i know how i feel and such. I can still remember everything that happened. okay well, here are the pictures.

*will update more later.
Loves.

hate is a strong word, but i really really really don't like you

I appologize for the delay in posting my post about my trip to watch Manchester United play footbal in Malaysia. As some might know, the internet connection has been so irritating this past few weeks or shall i say months. And frankly, its awfully terrible and -.-

* i'll try posting soon, if i can.

OMGEE

WILL UPDATE ABOUT THE MATCH AND EVERYTHING TOMORROW!

a piece of my mind worth remembering

Having Given The Chance To Watch Manchester United's Training Session.
That's A lifetime worth of memories that i shall keep for as long as i shall live. The feeling we get just by seeing them walking out of the tunnel and onto the field. That's something that you don't get to feel just by watching them through the TV. And that is a priceless memory.

*will post up the pictures later. as they need to be rotated, zoomed in and adjusted.

**will also update about the friendly match between MU and Malaysia as soon as possible.
xxx
farah nk.

futsal and bowling equals to body ache

I must say today was fun. It made my day. In someway or another it did. Though i'm over tired. My whole body is aching to bits. I need panadol. Futsal was filled with laughter whereas bowling was rather dumbo-ish, haha. I got only 70, but i am proud. My biggest achievement in bowling so far.

All in all, i had a guh-reat time. Happy Upcoming Birthday, Syakila. I love youlah woman.

last time

I am back to my senses now.
I've realised my mistakes and i'll try repairing them.
I will try to think about other topics to scribble and babble about besides yours truly.
I need to study hard now.
I am slacking. real badly.
I will not pick point on others.
I will be myself, and only me.
I love being me. Thats who i really am anyway.
And.
I am okay.

- Hope this will be the last. Once and for all it will be the last.

honesty is the best policy

Is it just me. Or is this world being irrational? There are some points in life, where we just have to forget and leave everything behind and just turn over a new leaf. For better or for worse. Sometimes, the worse thing that could or might happen may be the best thing that could ever happen to you. I just feel so insecure and tragic right now. Its like i've lost a part of me. I feel alone and lifeless just like a cat drowned in a bath tub gasping for air. I feel confused and dazzled just like when i get hit by a wall and i get butterflies all over my head. Being alone is nice. But not for too long. You'll get sick and tired easily. You'll give up on things easily. And you curse easily.

But to top my emotionally pressured self, i have a million things that i am thankful for. I have a wonderful dad that keeps me laughing with his ridiculous and hilarious jokes. I have a mom that keeps me company and supports me in everything that i do. I have a brother who never fails to irritate and bug me 24/7. I have cousins who backs me up all the time and that never fails to be my shoulder to cry on everytime i get wet. I have grandparents, aunts and uncles that are cooler than Dr. And Mrs. Cullen. I have friends who i feel are like my greatest joy in life besides my family.

But still. Inside me, there's still a hole waiting to be healed by someone or something powerful enough. I am fragile and i always wobble. I hate heartaches but i get them in everyway that i can imagine. I listen to sentimental songs when i am down. I eat a lot when i'm happy. I curse when everything seems to go wrong. I cry when my life's turning black instead of pink. I go ballistic when someone lies to me straight to my face, talks behind my back and pick points at others lavishly without thinking. I loathe people who are not honest and polite. I have life mottos that i bear in mind each and everyday. I make truckloads of mistakes and i still try standing tall. I have the tendency to repeat my mistakes and i do appologize when i do so. I try changing but humans don't seem to appreciate other people's changes. And to top it all. I am who i am.

lost and finally found

I am so tired, devastated, upset, embarassed, lethargic, dehydrated, full of hatred and pissed off. Seafield's carnival was seriously shitty this year. To some, it might not be. To me it totally is. And i really don't want to state it down here publicly. My backache is starting to get so irritating. The only part where i found enjoyable was when i entered the haunted house with my pals. It was scary and yes funny too. And some other moments that clearly does not need to be jotted down here.

And now, i've made up my mind on everything. I know what i want. For better or for worse, this is what I want. And what i want matters the most. Right now lah. So, i am done. I am tired. And i have had enough of all this unwanted pressures in my life. I never want to face this phase again. I'll start doing things more rationally and wisely. And i will always keep my options open. All i've got to say is, you'll know soon.
Au revoir.

Farah nk.

you are not alone

Carnival Day. Oh yeah, its only two days away. Really do hope it'll be a blast.
School's been really kind to me this few weeks. Alhamdulillah. Everything seems to be flowing smoothly and i am amazed. I just hope it will stay that way. Besides personal problems that i really don't need to to state here, i am perfectly fine. And i must thank the people around me for being so kind and supportive. Thank you.

And out of the blue, i am so into Mj's song. Sorry for being so outdated. But really, he fascinates me. Like really.
He is one of a kind, can't deny that fact. Never will.

Heartbreaks. And having to make bloody decisions. Seriously, you both are my number one enemy. I hate you more than i hate colouring my pre-school colouring books. And to me, it is just pathetic. I hate to make decisions. I am not good in making them. Sometimes, i go through it successfully and well sometimes okay most of the time i dont. And even when the answer is right in front of me, i can never see them. I always depend on other people to tell me whats best for me. I am a slowpoke honestly everytime it comes to this issues. I need a shrink. haha, okay i am exxagerating. Like i always do. If i don't then i am not farah.

Okay now, ill list down a few things that i dislike or hate. Just for keeps sake.
I hate colouring. I hate when i need to make a decision on the clothes i want to buy, the hairstyle i want to do, the food i want to eat, the shoes i want to buy, the colour of my hair band and yes, practically everything about making decision. I hate it when i am out of cash. I hate liars. I hate backstabbers. I hate hypocrites. Cant you just say something and hold on to it for the rest of your life? I dont think thats too much for me to ask. I hate it when i cry just too much because at the end of it, i'll get a bad headache and i tend to be unproductive for the rest of the day. I hate getting a cold, because unexpectedly your snort just comes out of nowhere. And even when you wipe it of, it'll run down again and again and again.

Okay, done. Thats all that i hate for now. But there's many things that i really love. And they're the things that i look for in life. I am loving life right now despite the fact that i have things that i hate. I'll cope. I thank you guys for always being there for me.

- i now know what i want.

butterfly, fly away

Okay first of all, i can't wait for hari carnival. I can feel the adrenaline rush. Like seriously. I can. Been busy sorting out my life and filing them. And also, i've been busy keeping my points straight and focusing on the important things. How sometimes i do wish life is somewhat perfect. Not perfect but just nice and comfortable enough for me to go through it peacefully. I've been getting headaches quite often lately. Enough said, i'll cope.

So, MJ passed away. I'm sure everyone knows. I don't really love him, but i do like him though. After all, he is the king of pop. He is a great person besides all the plastic surgeries he has done to himself. Rest in peace MJ.

I need to shop. I hope i have sufficient money. There are just too many things that i want to buy.

Loves.
xoxoxx